Getting Right for Giving

(note: this is not part of the Courage series. It came upon my heart and I felt it couldn’t wait to be shared)

Jesus said in Matthew 5:23-24

So when you are offering your gift at the altar, and you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift.

Jesus is saying here that our human relationships are vital; and of course they are. We can't follow any of the "one another" commands (love one another, pray for one another, bear one another's burdens, etc.) given in the New Testament if we are not part of a living, breathing community. For those of us who have spoken wedding vows, our relationship with our spouse is primary among these relationships. So, whenever we give, we should consider the state of our marriage.

In our church's mission statement we say that we are to support St. Paul's by giving of our time and our talents, as well as of our treasures. All can be seen as gifts to God and his church. Clearly, we need to consider our earthly relationships - including our marriages - not only when we are putting our envelopes in the offering basket, but also when we serve, giving of our time and talent... when we lead a bible study, when we sit on a board or committee, when we volunteer in the kitchen, or serve communion, or usher.

Jesus says that if we remember another person has something against us, we are to leave our gifts at the altar and make the relationship right first. For those who are married our spouse is the one we must think of first! If there is anything wrong in our marriage, that should be addressed and reconciled before we undertake any duties or service. When things aren't going well, it's easy to stay busy doing church things, much easier than putting in the time and effort to fix or rebuild our relationships. Going through the motions of religion is comfortable, but if we are neglecting our relationships, our marriages, it is not biblical. Religion can not be a focus of our lives when Christ is not at the center of our marriages.

In the introduction to his book Tribe of Mentors, Tim Ferriss says "Success can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations we are willing to have, and the number of uncomfortable actions we are willing to take."

Regardless of comfort, do what is necessary to reconcile with your spouse before spending that time on things that may be good, but are not vital. In God's eyes your marriage is vital.