Monday, April 16, 2012
This will come as no surprise to anybody, but marriage is work. It's hard, it's never ending, but when the work is done, the time invested it is of inestimable worth. It also is probably not a surprise, but the articles I write contain no information that is actually new. I research the topic of marriage all the time, through interviews and radio broadcasts, movies, online articles and books. I take the ideas that really resonate with me, in terms of things I see, people I know, and things that are going on in my own life, and I write about them. I try and give a Biblical perspective or grounding of the idea if it has none, but none of it makes a difference unless some married couple out there reads what I write - and decides to get to work!
To that end, I challenge all you married couples - make a commitment to work together on your relationship this month. Watch a movie together, and discuss it afterward. Or read a marriage book together, and discuss each chapter, like a devotional. Here are some suggestions:
The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Sheet Music by Kevin Lehman
The Kosher Sutra (nope. not even kidding) by Shmuley Boteach
Sex God by Rob Bell
Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch
You don't have to take my suggestions; go to a bookstore - make a date of it! - and browse the "Love and Relationships" section and choose one together. feeling adventurous? Browse the "Sexuality" shelves...
With movies there is fodder for a good couples' discussion everywhere. From obvious places like Fireproof, and Not Easily Broken, and even in "kids" films like Up, and The Incredibles. The key, of course is TO TALK. Let whatever you do together be a jumping off point for a discussion about your marriage. Be open and honest with each other. Listen intently, without judgement or defense.
When you start, reassure each other that anything that is said is because you want to make your union stronger, your love for each other deeper, and resolve to make it so.